7 tips to get what you really want.
Are you living your best life? Are you truly content? Well, It isn’t in human nature to be totally content. If we were, the species would die out. It is in human nature to constantly strive for progress, push the boundaries and break the paradigms of our current existence. And that is fueled by a feeling of dissatisfaction with the status quo, or a curiosity about what more is achievable or attainable, and the desire to have more of what makes us happy.
So, what do you really want? Have you stopped to ask yourself that question. Or are you simply following a set of rules, meeting expectations, striving to achieve goals because they seem appropriate? Are you following your own path or are you accepting the limitations of the circumstances you find yourself in?
According to the WHO, 1 out of 4 people will be impacted by poor mental health at some point in their lives. This is a pandemic more devastating and with more far-reaching consequences than COVID 19. The fact is that the COVID crisis only tipped the veil on a far bigger pandemic, one that is changing humanity and the fiber of our global society.
There are a plethora of buzz words circulating in cyber space - mental health, wellbeing, wellness, consciousness, mindfulness - the list goes on. What does all this really mean? There are more life coaches, wellness gurus and self-development apps that are pumping out information and advice at the speed of light, that is adding to the overwhelm and possibly, causing more anxiety and inertia, than ever before. That's precisely how I felt a year ago - confused and overwhelmed - paradox of choice.
If you are feeling stuck, uncertain about your future, somewhat bewildered, you are not alone. I've been there and it took total lockdown to make me stop and think, reset and re-calibrate. I needed a rest from the incessant, relentless pace of work and time to think differently. I acknowledged that if I carried on doing what I'd always done I would get what I'd always got. That may not be your situation. You may just be bored with life and want to change things up. So you may want to become more self-reliant - do something different - perhaps change jobs or start a side hustle, or even put your talents to use, and get paid for it. There's never been a better time in history to become self-reliant. Information, technology, knowledge and opportunity are so accessible and at our fingertips.
There are some very practical things you can do immediately to cut through the clutter and re-invent yourself. Here are some actions that I took to help me go from corporate slave to solopreneur in a year and a half.
The first thing that I realized is that the only thing you have any control over, is you - so it makes sense to start there. Doesn't it?
How to re-invent yourself
Write your backstory
Be specific about what you really want
Create a vision board
Set new goals
Create and action plan
Find your superpower
Create the life you want
Tip #1 - What's your backstory?
Revisit the major events in your life. Milestones, relationships, experiences – good and bad. The ones changed you in some small or dramatic way. The ones that propelled you forward or slowed you down. Think about them carefully. What lessons did you learn? Acknowledge that they happened and there's not turning the clock back. The past does not exist. it's just a stack of learning experiences. Often the subconscious conditioning around early events in our lives prevent us from moving forward. Acknowledge that they happened for you not to you and be grateful for what you learned. Focus only on what is good in your life – give very little time and thought to what is not. As Nelson Mandella famously said, "I never lose - I either win or I learn".
Tip #2 - What do you really want?
If you had your life to do over, what would that look like? What would you do differently? Where, would you live? What kind of work would you do? What kind of family and friends would you be surrounded by? What kind of relationships would you have? How would they make you feel? What interests and hobbies would you enjoy? What do you value? What are your core beliefs? Get a journal and write down all the things that you would like to have in your life – material and non-material. You may want a complete make over or just make a few tweaks. Have faith in yourself and believe that anything is possible.
Tip #3 - Create a vision board – How does it make you feel?
Visualize your ideal life and write down your goals. Make sure they are detailed, descriptive and specific, not vague or general. For instance, if one of your goals is to get fit and lose weight, Find images of fit healthy people and specify your goal weight. If you want to earn more money specify the amount you want to earn and what will help you to earn it. Write each goal as if it has already been achieved. Then think about how that makes you feel. Consciously shift your thoughts to things that make you feel good. Your vision of life will feel better than the reality and will propel you forward.
Tip #4 - Identify the gaps and set new goals.
Stop watching the news, stop binge watching Netflix, stop endlessly scrolling on social media. Prioritize your goals. Start with your health goals. Health is wealth. Without it you have nothing. Identify the knowledge, skills and tools you need to achieve optimum health and wellbeing. Once you’ve got a grip of this you will find most other aspects of your life start to fall into place – your work, your finances, your relationships, your interests. Look for authoritative sources of information, manage your social feeds, focus your thoughts on what you want to achieve. Create consistent habits that bring you closer to your goals. What you think about, you bring about. What you repeat you get good at.
Tip #5 - Create an action plan – set targets and track progress.
Visit your vision board every morning before you start your day. Feel excited. Start adding new actionable micro activities to your daily routine that are going to help you see progress. Find a tool that helps you keep track of your progress. Schedule in time to learn, absorb and take daily action. For instance, if you want to improve your fitness, learn more about your current state of health and what your particular needs are. we are all different so create your own individual plan that works for you. Identify what you need to change, then set up an exercise and nutrition routine that will serve you best and make it part of your lifestyle. Set weekly and monthly targets and reward yourself when you achieve a milestone. Create a practical plan that works for you. "Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else". - Margret Mead.
Tip #6 - Find your superpower and don’t settle.
We all have natural talents. Often, they are adopted and absorbed from our environments as we grow up. Things that motivate us and make effort feel good. They may be things we enjoy doing that require great effort but also give us great satisfaction. It’s different for everyone. Some of us enjoy the challenge of being in high performance environments and some of us find that negatively stressful. The reality is that it’s not always possible to be in situations that always suit us perfectly. Getting clear on what gives you a sense of purpose and fulfilment will steer you in directions that feel more comfortable and natural or fuel your ambition and get you out of your comfort zone. Your superpowers will evolve over time and through experience.
Tip #7 - Create the life you want – give it time, care and attention.
Your life can play out by default or by design. It’s entirely up to you. Stop looking outside of yourself to derive a sense of fulfilment. You’ve heard these phrases a million times - ‘Rome was not built in a day’ and ‘easy come easy go’. The fact is that anything worth having takes time and generally doesn’t come easy. And our lives are really a great work in progress. So, patience is and persistence are necessary. It’s perfectly natural to have setbacks and down days. It’s ok to feel frustrated. But it’s not ok either to give up or be too hard on yourself. Take a break, step back and start again. Build a self-care routine. Make time at least once a week to do something that makes you happy. Find balance, stay positive and remind yourself of the progress you have made. Then think about the consequences of not achieving your goals and how that would make you feel. This little hack will help you keep moving forward. Start showing up as a slightly better version of yourself every day. And remember to celebrate your progress.
Getting to know your-self can be a surprisingly enlightening experience.
Getting really clear on who you are and what you want is critical to creating your best life. If you found this post useful please leave your questions and comments, share insights from your own experience, or perhaps different points of view. Follow me on LinkedIn and Instagram where I will be sharing more practical tips and content like this as well as free strategy blueprints for transformation, business, brand, product and marketing. I’d love to have your feedback. Join the conversation and let me know if you are interested in more in-depth content regarding any of these topics. Share this with your network - knowledge shared is power multiplied.
If you are an aspiring solopreneur looking to set new personal goals or an entrepreneur in need of strategic brand advice or even an intrapreneur who want to catalyze change within your organization, visit brandcrib.com join the community and receive updates direct to your inbox every time I drop a post. Alternatively email me on georgette.kolkman@brandcrib.com. I’d be happy to help.
I hope this year brings you success, prosperity, personal growth and positive change.
Comments